Foundations of Change

Goals don’t belong at the beginning.

Let’s say you want to start running. How do a lot of people try to “motivate” themselves? Some variation of signing up for a 10k that is six months away.

What happens when you go out and run for the first time? You maybe can jog 1-2k? And you’re thinking “Oh crap, a 10k is SO far!” The danger of that, is you’re actually telling yourself “you’re not good enough“. And every time you go out, that mindset is hanging over your head.

Six months of sweat and effort while you inner voice is saying “that isn’t good enough.”

What if instead, you tracked effort? When you go out for your first “run”, start a timer when you get into any form of jogging pace. Maybe day one is only seven minutes. That also means eight minutes is celebrated.

You’re no longer dreading a long road ahead, you’re paying attention to the path in front of you. That opens space for you find enjoyment the process. Not focused on a goal, focused on yourself. Listening, learning, growing.

Plan for the Future, Focus on Today

But MATT! You just said goals don’t belong at the beginning, how am I supposed to plan for the future?!?

We ARE going to plan, and things new to your life will not have goals. Meditation is often a tricky behavior for people to incorporate into their life. Different people have different challenges with it, and parts of the approach are still the same.

Start with an “easy” meditation. Maybe a five minute guided breathing mediation from youtube. Next time, try it in a different part of the house. Different times of day. Schedule it once or twice a week. Play with variations.

Over time those small changes add up. and somewhere along the way it “clicks”. You start to appreciate it. That is a lot easier when you’re trying new and different ways.

Our brains love to learn and adapt, IF you feed it in the right framework.

Shining Light on our Actions

I’ve worked with humans for long enough to know there are very few absolutes about our behavior. One of those few exceptions, is the causal relationship between tracking your actions, and your actions changing direction.

You probably track things a lot more than you know. For instance, most people drive thousands of hours without a speeding ticket. Also, you check your speedometer fairly often while driving. A quick glance every thirty seconds during a quick ten minute drive, is still twenty times you tracked your behavior.

If you start logging all the food you eat, the things you eat will change. Without a plan, without a goal, without rules, you will start changing what you eat for the better. Just by tracking it.

Human Energy

“Just motivate yourself” Well that doesn’t work for most things in life.

We know it intuitively, but forget to apply it in our lives. Having someone to talk to about the challenges and successes. Brainstorming solutions instead of remind you of failure. Receiving grace through the whole process. Celebrating success.

That kind of support while trying to make changes, is hugely impactful.